Nov 25, 2011

Tearful Rejoicing

My Child, my heart is bleeding for you

Your sweet smile was so lovely
You made our home alive by your laughter
You found reasons to make us happy
Even, in the midst of your pain

You were tall and beautiful
You grew up so fast to make us glad
You found reasons to reassure us
Even, in the midst of your weakness

My Child, my heart is bleeding for you

Your laughter is no longer heard
Your soothing presence is no longer seen
You found reasons to speak to us
Even, in the midst of your silence

Your fond memories live in our hearts
Your melodious voice linger in our ears
You found reasons to be with us
Even, in the midst of your absence

My Child, my heart is rejoicing over you

You loved God and His people
You loved and valued us, your people
You found reasons to make us glad
Even in the midst of our pain

You endured suffering with a smile
You were deeply thankful to all
You found reasons to strengthen us
Even, in the midst of our sorrow

My Child, my heart is rejoicing over you

You have fought the good fight
You have finished the race valiantly
You found reasons to comfort us
Even, in the midst of our conflicts

You Shekinah, is with His *Shekinah now
You rejoice in that land without sorrow
You found reasons to make us joyful
Even, in the midst of our tears!


With joy and tears,

-Your Appa, Your Amma, Your Seri and your Sefi
* 'Shekinah' means divine presence /glory of God

Nov 24, 2011

"If you believe, you will see the glory of God"

Friends,

Thank you for the encouraging/comforting  comments. We are being strengthened by the prayers of many. We are thrilled to note that the life and death of Shekinah is challenging the hearts of many. What else is our joy,  than to see that the name of our Lord being honored and glorified, in the midst of the  loss of our dear sweet child?

We had taken an appointment for Shekinah with a Senior Oncologist on 9th November 2011  and on 8th evening, we went to Kottayam, to get her blood tests done. Once that was over,  by around 7 pm, she told us that she would like to meet Br.Geojy T Samuel, one of the elders of our fellowship. We rang him up and went straight to his house. We had good fellowship and Shekinah wanted some clarifications regarding the purpose of repeated sufferings. Br.Geoji was led to share with us the experience of Mary and Martha at the death of Lazarus. They both were regretting about  the absence of Jesus when their brother died – “If you were here..”. Br.Geoji  strengthened  the faith of Shekinah by pointing to another “If”. “If you believe, you will see the glory of God”. We ate together, prayed together – had to rush to complete another test, an ultra sound scan – and then we reached back home, by around 10pm.

The same night, she developed some complications and breathing difficulty. We rushed her to the hospital - but even they could not do anything. She became unconscious in front of us in the Emergency room of the hospital and soon was taken up to glory by around 3am. We had never expected this sweet child of us to depart so early and were shattered initially. But soon, the God of all comfort comforted and strengthened us.

Well, a few hours earlier, Shekinah and all of us had believed - to see the glory of God. What has happened now? Our dear daughter has departed and how can she or we see the glory of God?

The answer has become quite clear now. That same night, she has reached the glorious presence of the God almighty and is gazing at His glory! The funeral that took place on 10th was an occasion where His name was glorified and we all could experience the manifest presence of God. Many hearts were touched on that day. The letter that was sent out to my friends to thank them for their condolence messages is being circulated all over the world through group mails/social networking sites etc. and many are being blessed. We all are seeing very clearly, the name of God being glorified and magnified. O death, where is your sting? O death, where is your victory?

Devil would have felt very happy to have got Stephen – that anointed godly young man – stoned to death. What a terrible death! But devil could not nullify the influence of Stephen through this cowardly act. Saul who later became the apostle Paul was initially convicted through the glory on the face of Stephen, as he was dying. Stephen’s attitude (forgiving spirit) and his gaze to the throne of God, in the midst of excruciating pain has challenged many all through Christian history and is positively influencing us all, after many centuries. Though he lived only for a few years, Stephen had accomplished God’s purposes for his life.

Devil thought he had the last laugh when he got the son of God – Jesus – crucified by his agents. Was it not the worst thing to have happened in the history human race? Such a cruel death for the sinless Jesus who went around doing only good! But friend, the same thing has become the most blessed thing to have happened in the whole of the universe! It was through the death of Jesus that our sins were cleansed and we got saved! Jesus Christ rose up from the grave - He has also delivered us from the fear of death!

Shekinah too finished her course.  Her life, her death, her funeral and the incidents after that are truly glorifying and honoring God. Praise and honor and glory be to Him alone!

Friend, what ever may be the circumstance in our  life – we could glorify God – through life or by death (as it pleases Him) – if we see the sovereign, loving hand of God behind everything/every person/every circumstance! Let the glory of God be our passion!

Following mail extracts testify to what is happening in the lives of others through these incidents.   There are many more comments at the end of that note “Adieu to Shekinah – Thank you all”,  here  on FB.

If we believe, we will see the glory of God, in whatever situation that we are in. Manifestation of His glory may not be in the way we expect it to be – but if we are willing to yield fully and give up our will, He, for sure, will be exalted.
Thank you. Please continue to pray for us. We are fighting a battle within us and need His strength to endure and continually overcome.

God bless you all.
Love,
Santosh & Christy
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
“There is no doubt that Shekinah was a blessing, she blessed us in many ways, I have never met her or you. But the letter you wrote in the midst of such a trial is chasing us with many questions in different aspects,  I am sure such questions are all good for those who  love the truth. I am not writing them one by one at this moment. Your letter touched my heart more than  a 100 conferences. 
Brother, I managed to translate your letter into Malayalam for our brothers and sisters in the church, It took a full night's time for me to do the translation... but I didn't felt sleepy,  nor I was tired to read it in the church.
Thursday night while I was translating the letter I realized that time is running out very fast, I was determined to read it in the church for our edification. In between I was afraid with few concerns, like, will I be able to save it properly! What will I do if my printer misbehaves! If the power goes off!! If my hard disk crash!!. At that moment, I was reminded of my heavenly Father who controls all the networks Pc's and Printers in the world.” – ST from  the Middle East

"Dear Brother, this letter we translated into Malayalam and read in the prayer meeting today. We received all those words not with our ears, but with our hearts. We shed tears at times, we were silent at times, we were praising at times and at last we were encouraged and refreshed and reinstated and our hearts were pounding against our chests and we returned with a renewed spirit and an urge to change our priorities.” – AK from the same church

“I am presently living in Bhubaneswar. I read your words of encouragement, through Shekinah's life, and am blessed immensely.  It has fueled my heart to burn more for Jesus. Though I never met Shekinah, her life has blessed me. Though we don't know what is going to happen the very next minute from now, but we know that our God is in full control. 
      I had to move out of Bangalore on Job purpose and I was continuously thinking why God made me to move out from Bangalore. But God out of His love said it's for His own purpose. And today when I read your words it affirmed the same. Once I was afraid of everything, but now I fear God and I am afraid of nothing. 
      Shekinah's life and your family's faith not only blessed known people - but also many unknown, like me. Thank you for sharing this with us.” – EP from Bhubaneswar

“Yes, as you have mentioned in your mail that all the worldly things we have to leave one day from us ....all of us are in a same boat . If we understand this truth, our priority will change in this earth itself. Our prayers are with you.
Recently I read the book of Joni Erickson, and her testimony and her faith in Jesus.
She said -Heaven is the reality and if you fix your heart on heaven, it helps you to live a better life down here on this earth.
I would like to mail this letter to my Christian friends and those who are searching God. It will teach , tell about Who is Jesus Christ and help change their priorities in life .I have printed your mail and made a file , kept in my hall, so that people will read and know about Jesus and faith of True Christians.” – RW from the Middle East

“I will only say that I am "extremely" happy for you that you have understood the total meaning of Genesis to Revelation. We couldn't meet Shekinah before she travelled on, but I pray I will meet her where she has gone, and I would like for you to be the one to introduce her to me when we're both there - in God's time and presence.
 Our love and regards to your dear wife whom I'm sure will be the one most affected. I need you to tell her that her labour of 9 months was not in vain, because as Mary was blessed, so is she blessed. Her daughter will be the reason for many around me to hear about the Lord.
 I work in a largely Hindu community of Indians in Nigeria. I have been thinking of how to introduce Jesus to them. Many times I have thought about compiling an intelligent write up (summary) to educate and inspire them to follow Jesus. I did not even imagine when I heard that Shekinah was ill that it would be through her and your life that God would encourage me to share his word. I am with your permission going to share your testimony individually with my colleagues so that all would have heard of the "peace that passes understanding" - I've always thought of what answer I would give while in heaven, and my CEO says "EE, you knew? And you didn't tell me?”
Thanks for being chosen to touch our lives. God bless you all - I'm sure it is not at all easy. BUT Shekinah is in better hands than ours.  God be with you. “ EE from Nigeria

“I received a copy of your letter (Adieu to Shekinah) forwarded by  a friend.
I read it (and many others too )  with tears rolling down.
Truly overwhelming. Praise be to the Lord, God of  all comfort who comforts in the afflictions.
Though the separation is painful, there is reason for  joy & peace.
 Oh death, where is your victory?
Shekinah has really become a fragrance of Christ to  many a people.
People cannot refrain themselves from  forwarding your letter to relatives & friends.” SK from Middle East

“We thank God for your testimony and can see and hear what God is doing on earth, making a people prepared for his coming. You are in our hearts .May God be richly glorified” – JC from Goa

“What a powerful testimony to your faith in a loving Father Who does everything perfectly. I have never read anything written at a time of bereavement that is so powerful.” ZP from Bangalore

“Praise GOD!!!!!!!!!Wonderful testimony!!!!!!!!!!.It has really touched me and made me to come one step closer to GOD. We’ll certainly continue praying for your family” – BS from Hyderabad

“Thank you for sharing the story of victory out of your painful journey.  We as a small prayer group, every month assembled at the home of A&J and prayed for your daughter and your family.  I prayed daily for Shekinah’s recovery as well for the last 6 month or so.  But then, God’s purposes we cannot fully understand, as you said. 
 I am so humbled before your faith and the courage to bare your life before men and God. We thank God for you and your family, and for giving us a chance to witness the testimony, faith and life that you so profoundly shared with us.  Praise and Glory to His name and continued hands of mercy on you and yours, Always! “ T from the USA


“The life of Shekinah, her parent's testimony at the funeral service, your thought-provoking letter...every thing was a challenge and an eye-opener for us all..” – PM from Kerala

“I remember the brief trip we had in the train when you all went to Ooty, and  the time together last December conference. I also am so glad I could speak a little bit with Shekinah in October. Shekinah is remarkable in her simplicity and innocence and stands out as a truly godly girl. You have been wonderful parents. And now you have presented her back to the Lord. Thank the Lord for giving you such a lovely gift for these few years. In one sense I feel she belonged to all of us and we all feel the loss when the Lord took her. He heals our broken hearts and lifts us up every moment.
We pray for you everyday. You comfort and challenge us by your words and your spirit. May the Lord continue to use you to bless many more people in these days”  - AP from Bangalore

“Dear honorable father of a child in Eternity,

Yes...that is your address now. You have given back a child to God, after nurturing her as He pleases, for the last 15 long years, in this dirty world. I also have a 14 year old girl child. Though she is a born again child, she is not that serious about her Eternity. But Shekinah has qualified in His exam!!
 I thank my Father in Heaven, for giving you a chance to be Shekinah's father. You are blessed by that appointment.
 You have done your job well on earth, by sending her own Home.
 You are privileged parents. Her memories will make your alignment straight with Dad God!” ST from Kerala

“This is an absolutely committed testimony of a family that God has put together for the world to look up to. Experiences that are bitter by world standards are sometimes God's best examples of him upholding us, His purposes, His demonstration that He is there with us ..through it all !
 I lost my mother to cancer too some 12 years ago..  and Shekinah's experience , her words  and her attitude to  her family and to the battle that waged within her only reiterates that God has called her back to be with Him...as she was too precious to Him than we could ever comprehend.
God is with you and your family through all of this ... may His love , peace  and comfort be forever with you” - RT

“Thank you so much for the mail. I thank God for the courage and strength He gave you to sustain this heavy loss. Now, when I look around, when many wither and crumble down in the midst of fiery trials, a child of God like you can stand still, and comfort others.” – SK NY USA

“I'm so sorry to hear of Shekinah's death, and yet rejoicing with you at her graduation into the throne-room of the Heavenly Father. Thank you for sending this note, and allowing me to taste the sweetness of your peace in the Lord.
With Shekinah now present with the Lord, not only is Jesus your anchor at the throne of God, as it says in Hebrews, but you also have another anchor tethering and drawing your hearts to eternity as you miss her. May the Lord heal the pain, but keep the increased ties that draw you into His presence strong.
I'm sharing your note with other friends” - JL USA

“This is indeed a very beautiful letter only the Lord put on your heart to write. I sent it to all my children. I have never read or heard such a beautiful testimony glorifying the Lord whom Shekinah loved dearly and whom He loved so dearly that He wanted her so much with Him because she was His treasure in whom He had filled with His Glory. I have never really personally known Shekinah, but the Glory of the Lord was on her face too in the lovely photo of you all as a family. I praise the Lord that He was glorified not only in her life but also in her death touching many lives in the funeral service.” – IR Bangalore

“As I know Shekinah is doing absolutely fine and doing the very best thing ever she can do  - Gazing at the Glorious face of Our Saviour and Master Lord Jesus... Now.......... and for ever and ever throughout all eternity.
We are and were tremendously blessed as a family to read about your testimony.All Glory to God.
 Praise the Lord for each stage and moment of this incidence  - for He was very much with You all.... so that You all could Glorify his name all along till Shekinahs' departure.
 The clearest proof during this incidence was the fact that God taught us about his Love and Presence by speaking to Us through You.
 He Taught us to find Rest, Peace and all Answers in Him since he has already prepared this before He send such incidences in our lives.
Why God allows such things in our life? so we may need an (extra) encouraging Word  or Sympathy from other to lift us up and fill the vacuum. Clearly NO. He wants us to know about His LOVE.. 
 On 26th Of March 2011 When faced with uncertainty and lots of questions when we met in CMC Vellore on that afternoon at 1:13 pm.
You spoke to Us about what happened to Daniel's 3 Friend (S,M and A) when they were condemned to be thrown in fire.
NOTHING (dramatic) HAPPENED BEFORE OR  AFTER, BUT ONCE THEY WERE IN FURNACE, GOD WAS PRESENT WITH THEM AS A 4th PERSON.
 He will never allow us to Trod a way he has not gone before - Even Death- He tasted before Us and For Us.
While going through this situation He wanted us to be "Rest Assured" and Know Him as a Loving Father (more then an Almighty, Able, Willing and a Living Father in such situation)
Praise the Lord to hear about Shekinah's testimony that she sought to Honor God till the very end by being sensitive about God's Presence more then her physical need, agony and suffering.
(In the midst of extreme suffering and pain, she was calm and cheerful. She had a sensitive conscience and had no debts to clear. The day before her death, at lunch time, she called her mother back and apologized for a trivial demand of her. Even in the midst of excruciating pain, if she felt that she was disrespectful to us.)
We too are encouraged to Keep God and Our saviour Lord Jesus First and foremost In our Day to Day lives no matter what situation he allow us to go through.
May God Help Us all and Give Us Grace. “ B & V from Bangalore


         “Your letter has encouraged, edified and comforted me while I was thinking how to comfort you at this time of sorrow. I wept a lot this morning after going through the words of your letter.  We praise the Lord for the wonderful life and testimony your family has established in spite of fiery trials.  The following words Jesus spoke to Peter came to my mind as I got strengthened through your letter.
Luke 22:31, 32: And the Lord said, Simon, Simon, behold, Satan hath desired to have you, that he may sift you as wheat: But I have prayed for thee, that thy faith fail not: and when thou art converted, strengthen thy brethren.
We as a church are also being comforted with the glorious hope of meeting our beloved Shekinah mole one day with the Lord in the heavenly abode.” GK from the Middle East

“We were touched by your letter to your friends. The Lord is close to the broken hearted. His closeness is all we need. He is comforting you all as a family. This is also for the blessing of many. How marvelous and unsearchable are His ways”. – GT Mumbai

“It is not easy to write when you are under so much sorrow but this email is certainly going to touch many people, thanks!” PA from the USA

“We are very thankful to the Lord for the way He is encouraging you and your family. This is clear gospel presented to this forum and we pray that this would bear much fruit.” – K & S from the USA



“Yes bro there is no need to question Him for we know His love for us,
and He is faithful that He wont allows anything to tempt us beyond our
ability. We are more than a conquerors  2 Cor2:14, the sweet aroma of Christ is
spreading through you and her.” – V from the Middle East

“praises be to God our Father, thank u very much indeed forwarding the below Adieu, its inspiring and really touching, though she is dead and it seems that still do speaks to us with beautiful memoirs of her,  let many may find Christ through this adieu” – JV from Kerala


“Ur living testimony is a challenging one. It encourages my faith. May the Lord comfort u all and strengthen u all in the days ahead to glorify Him.
You and ur family had stood with the Lord and the defeated satan is put to shame.
Praise and Glory be to His name.” – DT from Tamil Nadu

“I've been really touched by your testimony as well as your spirit of encouragement in the midst of such a loss. I can related to this loss some
19 years back when I lost my sister to blood cancer. It was a great eye-opener to me at that point in time to understand that death is real. The pain was too excruciating at that time but I feel now God has an amazing design & plan for each of our lives”. – BT from Bangalore

Adieu Shekinah - promoted to glory on 09/11/2011



Dear friends,


Thank you for your words of comfort and encouragement. Yes, it is really painful to lose our dear daughter, after giving the best available treatment and after being with her physically, mentally and emotionally, through out the last one year or so. 


Atheism and Philosophy has nothing to offer in terms of comfort to us - the parents of a 15 year old girl who succumbed to bone cancer on 09/11/2011.  Boozing might help forget the sorrow for a little while – but that is pure selfishness and running away from the responsibility to support my wife and younger children, who are wide awake to the harsh reality.


But friends, we are being comforted and strengthened by God, in an amazing way. This proves to us and others that our faith is really working. What my wife and I manifest in the midst of this fiery trial is not ‘courage’ or ‘valour ’ – it is the strength and grace we receive from our heavenly Father. 


We have a living relationship with our heavenly Father.  Some of you know that I was a rebelliousguy. Later I became a religious man.  But the real change happened, when I started experiencing arelationship with God through the Lord Jesus Christ. Then the idea of God as a hard task master sitting far away, changed to  that of a loving Father who is very near – not just very near, but who is inside me, who strengthens me , who talks to me and with whom I can talk to! This relationship journey started in the year 1987. At one point of time, the weight of my sins came heavily upon me and I was frustrated. Even in the areas where I had refined myself on the outside, I could see thorough corruption inside. It was only after experiencing the forgiveness of my sins through the blood of Jesus Christ – who died as a sacrifice for my sins (this the only way God has provided to experience lasting peace from the burden of sin), that I became a free and happy man. It was not a complicated process. No painful sacrifice, pilgrimage or offering from my side was required. I just had to be honest about my condition and acknowledge the need of a savior. It was an act of faith. With remorse about my past life and a willingness to be a child of God, in faith, I believed that God took the form of man, came to this earth as Jesus Christ, lived a holy life and died on the cross for my sins. I requested Him to forgive my sins and take control of my life. I was forgiven, my sins rolled away and I started experiencing joy and peace. As a public confession of my new found faith, I also got immersed in water and rose up (water baptism) – signifying that my old self is gone and have become a new person.


Since then, my life has changed radically. My desire is to please and glorify God. I have been finding grace and strength to overcome base passions, anger, greed etc., to experience contentment, fulfillment and to endure hardships peacefully. When I see my weaknesses, I look to Him and am strengthened by the Holy Spirit and guided by the words of the Bible. When I go wrong at some point, through honest confession to God the Father (not to a human being) and repentance (turning back from a particular sin), that wrong/sin is cleansed and I again experience peace.


As a family, we stick together, by His grace. We love, support and forgive each other. We realize that being examples to our children and passing on values to them is a better inheritance than lands and gold. We also believe that God, heaven, hell and eternity are real and that we need to give an account of our life (words, deeds and motives). Jesus Christ who died, rose up and went back to the Father is going to come back soon. We have opportunity to finish our course on this earth only till we die or until He comes back.


In the light of the above, we are able to see the departing of Shekinah in a different perspective. Shekinah is a treasure that God handed over to us. By His enabling and grace, we took care of her well and guided her to a relationship with God. In addition to being bon again, she too confessed her faith publicly by taking water baptism. She was a blessing to us and all who came across her path. She respected and valued her parents, loved and cared for her siblings. She loved God and His people. At Vellore, once when she expressed some fears, we all sat together and discussed about death. It was mentioned that through the death of Jesus on the cross and His rising up, we could overcome, the fear of death. Afterwards, she told me that all other fears vanished when she was able to overcome the fear of death. In the midst of extreme suffering and pain, she was calm and cheerful. She had a sensitive conscience and had no debts to clear. The day before her death, at lunch time, she called her mother back and apologized for a trivial demand of her. Even in the midst of excruciating pain, if she felt that she was disrespectful to us, parents, who would compel her to take food/medicines, she would apologize. She grew up to be a godly, holy child. Her time on this earth is over and we are sure that she has gone to be with her heavenly Father – to a land where there is no pain, sickness or sorrow. She has finished her final examination and is now enjoying the holidays at the Father’s house! We have the satisfaction that we were able to hand over back to God that treasure, in the way He desired it to be.
Sooner or later, we too would depart from this earth and if we continue the loving relationship with the heavenly Father, we too would experience this eternal bliss and would meet a healthy Shekinah there.


On Shekinah having diagnosed with Osteosarcoma (a tough bone cancer) towards the end of 2010, God enabled us  to provide the best available treatment. Though she was treated at CMC Hospital Vellore, we had even consulted the Senior Oncologist & Osteosarcoma specialist and the Surgical Oncologist at Memorial Sloan Kettering Cancer Centre (MSKCC),New York,  where Mrs.Sonia Gandhi was treated recently. My wife and I stayed with her at Vellore, and cared for her during the last one year (I took a one year break from my work as a Professor in an Engineering College). We all got very close to each other and started to value each other much more. God also proved His faithfulness by taking care of all the financial needs in amazing ways.


In the process, we have also learned many valuable life lessons. In the early days of 2010 December, SSLC exam of Shekinah was a priority to us. All of a sudden, by the latter half of the month, her life became more important and all other things including the SSLC exam became quite insignificant. Now, in comparison with eternal life, everything else is losing its charm and value. I also realize that everything that we hold on tightly is like foolishly trying to hold a glass of water tightly in a closed fist. Every drop of water will seep through the gaps. There is nothing that we can hold on to tightly. We all need to go back empty handed. We could develop a better sense our priorities.


Life is short and uncertain. Our loved ones, who are so near to us, could depart from us anytime. I also leaned the need to be good, kind and merciful to those who are close to us. How good it is, if we do not have to regret about harsh words, pointing of fingers or anything else that would hurt our spouse and children.


We could experience the glorious presence of God in the funeral service. We too received grace to stand up and share (beside the dead body of Shekinah) our experiences with our daughter and of the glorious hope that we have.  This spoke to the hearts of many - and many   rededicated their lives to sincerely love and live for Jesus Christ. Many keep phoning and writing to me about how they were touched and influenced by attending this funeral service.


What else, do we need to ask for? While she lived, she blessed many.  Even through her death, she blessed and strengthened many. God’s name was glorified through all this. Death too has become an occasion for His glory. Oh! Death, where is your sting? Death cannot frighten and overpower God’s children who are secure in his love.


I also believe that God is infallible and will never make mistakes. He is Omnipresent (everywhere), Omnipotent (all powerful) and Omniscient (all knowing).  He does everything with a plan and a purpose.
We may not fully understand His ways now, but everything will become clear then – when we too move into eternity. So I need not question him now!


Such tragedies are not punishments from God. God is still a loving Father and All things work   together for good (eternal good – which is our transformation to the likeness of Jesus Christ) to those who love God and those who have a relationship with the Father.  God is preparing us for His purposes through such fiery trials.           


Friend, this life is wonderful and you too could experience it if you earnestly desire it (after having fed up with your present way of living). You too by an act of faith could enter into a living relationship with the heavenly Father. Since you have love and concern for me, I felt it is my responsibility to share this good news with you.  


Death is real. Have you thought about it? Are you ready to die? Are you ready to face the death of your loved ones?


If you have further queries on this, you are welcome to mail me to: mathewsantosh@yahoo.com   


Please continue to pray for us.


God bless you all.


Love,
Santosh, Christy, Serena and Sefina

Shekinah's family