Dear friends,
Thank you for your words of comfort and encouragement. Yes, it is really painful to lose our dear daughter, after giving the best available treatment and after being with her physically, mentally and emotionally, through out the last one year or so.
Atheism and Philosophy has nothing to offer in terms of comfort to us - the parents of a 15 year old girl who succumbed to bone cancer on 09/11/2011. Boozing might help forget the sorrow for a little while – but that is pure selfishness and running away from the responsibility to support my wife and younger children, who are wide awake to the harsh reality.
But friends, we are being comforted and strengthened by God, in an amazing way. This proves to us and others that our faith is really working. What my wife and I manifest in the midst of this fiery trial is not ‘courage’ or ‘valour ’ – it is the strength and grace we receive from our heavenly Father.
We have a living relationship with our heavenly Father. Some of you know that I was a rebelliousguy. Later I became a religious man. But the real change happened, when I started experiencing arelationship with God through the Lord Jesus Christ. Then the idea of God as a hard task master sitting far away, changed to that of a loving Father who is very near – not just very near, but who is inside me, who strengthens me , who talks to me and with whom I can talk to! This relationship journey started in the year 1987. At one point of time, the weight of my sins came heavily upon me and I was frustrated. Even in the areas where I had refined myself on the outside, I could see thorough corruption inside. It was only after experiencing the forgiveness of my sins through the blood of Jesus Christ – who died as a sacrifice for my sins (this the only way God has provided to experience lasting peace from the burden of sin), that I became a free and happy man. It was not a complicated process. No painful sacrifice, pilgrimage or offering from my side was required. I just had to be honest about my condition and acknowledge the need of a savior. It was an act of faith. With remorse about my past life and a willingness to be a child of God, in faith, I believed that God took the form of man, came to this earth as Jesus Christ, lived a holy life and died on the cross for my sins. I requested Him to forgive my sins and take control of my life. I was forgiven, my sins rolled away and I started experiencing joy and peace. As a public confession of my new found faith, I also got immersed in water and rose up (water baptism) – signifying that my old self is gone and have become a new person.
Since then, my life has changed radically. My desire is to please and glorify God. I have been finding grace and strength to overcome base passions, anger, greed etc., to experience contentment, fulfillment and to endure hardships peacefully. When I see my weaknesses, I look to Him and am strengthened by the Holy Spirit and guided by the words of the Bible. When I go wrong at some point, through honest confession to God the Father (not to a human being) and repentance (turning back from a particular sin), that wrong/sin is cleansed and I again experience peace.
As a family, we stick together, by His grace. We love, support and forgive each other. We realize that being examples to our children and passing on values to them is a better inheritance than lands and gold. We also believe that God, heaven, hell and eternity are real and that we need to give an account of our life (words, deeds and motives). Jesus Christ who died, rose up and went back to the Father is going to come back soon. We have opportunity to finish our course on this earth only till we die or until He comes back.
In the light of the above, we are able to see the departing of Shekinah in a different perspective. Shekinah is a treasure that God handed over to us. By His enabling and grace, we took care of her well and guided her to a relationship with God. In addition to being bon again, she too confessed her faith publicly by taking water baptism. She was a blessing to us and all who came across her path. She respected and valued her parents, loved and cared for her siblings. She loved God and His people. At Vellore, once when she expressed some fears, we all sat together and discussed about death. It was mentioned that through the death of Jesus on the cross and His rising up, we could overcome, the fear of death. Afterwards, she told me that all other fears vanished when she was able to overcome the fear of death. In the midst of extreme suffering and pain, she was calm and cheerful. She had a sensitive conscience and had no debts to clear. The day before her death, at lunch time, she called her mother back and apologized for a trivial demand of her. Even in the midst of excruciating pain, if she felt that she was disrespectful to us, parents, who would compel her to take food/medicines, she would apologize. She grew up to be a godly, holy child. Her time on this earth is over and we are sure that she has gone to be with her heavenly Father – to a land where there is no pain, sickness or sorrow. She has finished her final examination and is now enjoying the holidays at the Father’s house! We have the satisfaction that we were able to hand over back to God that treasure, in the way He desired it to be.
Sooner or later, we too would depart from this earth and if we continue the loving relationship with the heavenly Father, we too would experience this eternal bliss and would meet a healthy Shekinah there.
On Shekinah having diagnosed with Osteosarcoma (a tough bone cancer) towards the end of 2010, God enabled us to provide the best available treatment. Though she was treated at CMC Hospital Vellore, we had even consulted the Senior Oncologist & Osteosarcoma specialist and the Surgical Oncologist at Memorial Sloan Kettering Cancer Centre (MSKCC),New York, where Mrs.Sonia Gandhi was treated recently. My wife and I stayed with her at Vellore, and cared for her during the last one year (I took a one year break from my work as a Professor in an Engineering College). We all got very close to each other and started to value each other much more. God also proved His faithfulness by taking care of all the financial needs in amazing ways.
In the process, we have also learned many valuable life lessons. In the early days of 2010 December, SSLC exam of Shekinah was a priority to us. All of a sudden, by the latter half of the month, her life became more important and all other things including the SSLC exam became quite insignificant. Now, in comparison with eternal life, everything else is losing its charm and value. I also realize that everything that we hold on tightly is like foolishly trying to hold a glass of water tightly in a closed fist. Every drop of water will seep through the gaps. There is nothing that we can hold on to tightly. We all need to go back empty handed. We could develop a better sense our priorities.
Life is short and uncertain. Our loved ones, who are so near to us, could depart from us anytime. I also leaned the need to be good, kind and merciful to those who are close to us. How good it is, if we do not have to regret about harsh words, pointing of fingers or anything else that would hurt our spouse and children.
We could experience the glorious presence of God in the funeral service. We too received grace to stand up and share (beside the dead body of Shekinah) our experiences with our daughter and of the glorious hope that we have. This spoke to the hearts of many - and many rededicated their lives to sincerely love and live for Jesus Christ. Many keep phoning and writing to me about how they were touched and influenced by attending this funeral service.
What else, do we need to ask for? While she lived, she blessed many. Even through her death, she blessed and strengthened many. God’s name was glorified through all this. Death too has become an occasion for His glory. Oh! Death, where is your sting? Death cannot frighten and overpower God’s children who are secure in his love.
I also believe that God is infallible and will never make mistakes. He is Omnipresent (everywhere), Omnipotent (all powerful) and Omniscient (all knowing). He does everything with a plan and a purpose.
We may not fully understand His ways now, but everything will become clear then – when we too move into eternity. So I need not question him now!
Such tragedies are not punishments from God. God is still a loving Father and All things work together for good (eternal good – which is our transformation to the likeness of Jesus Christ) to those who love God and those who have a relationship with the Father. God is preparing us for His purposes through such fiery trials.
Friend, this life is wonderful and you too could experience it if you earnestly desire it (after having fed up with your present way of living). You too by an act of faith could enter into a living relationship with the heavenly Father. Since you have love and concern for me, I felt it is my responsibility to share this good news with you.
Death is real. Have you thought about it? Are you ready to die? Are you ready to face the death of your loved ones?
If you have further queries on this, you are welcome to mail me to: mathewsantosh@yahoo.com
Please continue to pray for us.
God bless you all.
Love,
Santosh, Christy, Serena and Sefina
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